Archive | time

Hope

I celebrate for today is a holiday.
Everyday is a holiday that never grows old. Every day is another day to celebrate the moment that the Lord, my Lord, Yaweh, saved my soul, once and for all. And though this salvation which will last for ever and ever and ever is the greatest gift, God gives more and more gifts every day. For He is the gift-giver and he is never changing…his gifts will continue to fall from heaven every moment (even this moment as you sit and at your computer) for eternity. For I will live forever and you will live forever and no man or woman will ever lose their existance. Some will die to the Lord and they will be separated for all time-the ultimate tragedy. But I know in the depths of my heart and from the pages of His Word that I will not. I will exist and I will dwell with my savior. Tell me-what is more worthy of celebration?

So I spend everyday with hope. I see more of the light than the darkness…only brief shadows which fall on my life and then fade. I see the pasture as my haven. My place to worship. I see my family as my dearest friends and know that this is a good thing. I see my writing as my calling and my passion and my joy. Our Christmas tree, a new song learned, a letter from a friend, a cup of hot Earl Grey, a sun set which paint will try to mimick until the last painter dies-all as beatiful little golden blessings like the ring of a tiny chime in my heart. And I thank God.

But some linger in the shadows-hope is a stranger to them. They rely on themselves and therefore fail, for we are only human and humans are not capable of success without God. So they try and they fail and they try and they fail and finally they cease to try any longer. Watching t.v. doesn’t save their soul, drinking doesn’t save their soul, having lots of friends or money or fame doesn’t save their soul. They give up, and I don’t blame them. Trying needs hope as fuel. Nobody chooses a dull knife to cut an apple knowing that it won’t slice. Nobody hikes up a mountain with only a bottle of water knowing that there is no hope of making it to the top. You simply don’t try to do things without the hope that you’ll succeed. And so they have no hope and so they fail. What a tragic story this is for millions of people. But Christ is the only lasting hope and those who find Him and accept Him and have a heart that is a temple for Him to stay in, have hope. We have the light in the dark world. We know that the shadows, even the longest black-outs always come to an end for us. But Everly Pleasant is Frequently Dismal. I sometimes forget that the darkness in my life is only a shadow passing through a lit room and I give into Lucifer’s whispers that I too should give up and rebel.

But the good news is, I can give up. I can give up every single little worry, every pain and every fear and every problem to God who will handle it as I walk with him through this life…this life lit with His Hope.
The picture above is The Oak Tree by Ansel Adams
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Riding the wave

Swirly Plate By, E.P.

When will people learn?

That includes myself. When will we ever not be taken by surprise when something devastating happens? When somebody dies…someone that we actually knew. Not the grandmother of the friend of the girl you know from Sunday School. Not that random face in the obituaries. We don’t open the paper and go: “Oh my goodness! I can’t believe it…someone died this week.” We are only surprised when it’s someone we knew. And we think Me? The main character of my story…no way. And this is all just repetitive and morbid I know, but I’m getting at something.

Time. It’s ticking…slipping by. I have expressed previously my fear of change and the creepiness I find it the natural passage of time, so I get this idea, I stick it in my head, that time is just a wave you have to ride. But you know, our time on earth ends. The wave washes up. At some point, it will be over. Obviously, anyone who has ever experienced this hasn’t blogged about what it was like or told their friends. They left for good (okay, minus Lazarus etc.) so we don’t think about it, we forget that it will ever happen because all we remember is being alive and no one who has ever been anything but alive has ever spoken about it. But us Christians have a gift to give and we need to snap out of our daze, hop off the wave and realize that this is a limited time edition of a one life only sale!

Okay, lying all corniness aside, we’ve got to pick up the pace. We get awkward, we want more time. We have all these little problems. Well when we die and those people whose souls we sacrificed to the evil idol of procrastination are being judged, won’t you think that this is a bigger problem then “I’m shy”?!

I feel kind of bad saying all this in such a light, goofy bluntness way because I’m seriously convicted and passionate about it. I’ll be honest and tell you that I’ve never really witnessed to someone. (Okay, minus once when I was very young…that didn’t go so well…) I hope that my life has been a witness and I’ve talked to people about God and faith before but I’ve never prayed and then walked up to a person who was lost with the intentions of taking them to Heaven with me and started talking. Why?

Maybe blindness. Blindness to the need, the situation, the fact that that what’s tugging my heart is something real. Maybe for you it’s anxiety or the fact that your not confident enough in your own relationship with Christ. You haven’t memorized enough scripture yet and you’ve only prayed for a few days. And I know that I’m getting these ideas from somewhere…at one point or another I’m sure I’ve struggled with these things too. Or maybe it’s that I’ve never met a lost person.

NOT.

This guy that my dad led to Christ still calls him on his anniversary of acceptance and thanks him. That makes you feel good doesn’t it?

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Welcome Autumn

Dearest Reader,
I think that I may actually have some inspiration for this entry but I have not yet patched it together so, if you find it choppy and awkward, I beg your pardon.
As we transition into autumn for the two thousand and seventh time, I get this feeling and identify it as negative. I get this feeling every time the seasons change, Winter to Spring, Spring to Summer, Summer to Autumn or Autumn to Winter, yet I still feel like I’ve been pricked every time this feeling occurs. It’s mostly sadness at first that Summer is over and the Summer of 2007 will never come again no matter how long I wait. That it’s not going to be summer anymore, but it’s going to be autumn and then autumn will be over and it will never come again and then winter will arrive and then leave and it’s a natural endless cycle that I can’t and shouldn’t do anything about so why should I even care?
Well, I do care every time! I am hyper-sensitive to change which is something I try to ignore, but it also does have some sane, practical, realistic sadness to it…doesn’t it? I guess when you’re a writer nothing is just practical or realistic and you get funky emotions toward everything because nothing is just a change. You see everything as a book. You think about how big the baby was when the season began. Has she grown?
You think about your friendships changing. For better or for worse?
And you analyze yourself, your age, your own changes. And really, this is pointless. It’s like trying to describe your own eyes when you can’t see them. I’ve found you can’t describe those you know best because you know every side of them, even the side that is rarely ever seen. And who do you know better than yourself? Therefore, you can never really see yourself for who you are. Are you how you should be at this age? What is a fifteen year-old supposed to do? When exactly was it that you gave up barbies? Why? It was always fun. Was it wrong to give it up? Did you do it out of peer pressure?
Then, in thinking these thoughts your tempted to change the cycle and go backwards.
And then you regret growing up. But it wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t any body’s fault. It wasn’t a fault at all. It was normal. It was natural. It was necessary. Anyone and everyone changes. It’s okay. Did I just say that? ;)
But, to be totally honest, I understand. I see the positive things about aging and maturing and I look forward to the changes of my future, but then again, I will miss my young childhood on occasion. That too is natural I suppose. It’s like that song If I could by Jack Johnson. I man dies and a baby is born. Do you cry or celebrate? I little of both. With new things, old things disappear. The keyword of this entry being “natural.”
I made the mistake of watching Peter Pan the night before my thirteenth birthday. Let’s just say that many tears were shed. I am one of those people who panic at change in age as well as everything else and I waited patiently for Peter to arrive and sweep me away to Neverland, when really, I would’ve proffered “Not-yet-land.”
Though I may be the last person on earth to figure this out, good things come with time even if other good things…leave. What pains me is to think of those children who waste their childhoods trying to grow up to soon or who never form a healthy imagination. For me, I feel like shouting at all the windows in every elementary school saying: “Savor it! It’s all wonderful! It’ll end before you know it!” But I know that you can never really appreciate anything until it’s swept out from under your feet like a rug and carried off to the attic. And I guess that I would be the same as those children, wasting their childhood staring at their future, if I were to waste these years of my life staring back.
When the bible said that we shouldn’t waste, I don’t think it was referring only to food and water. I think it was also talking about time and sunshine and beautiful days and company and ages and opportunities. But, you are older than you were when you began reading this article and you will be older when you go to bed and older still when you wake up, and even if you’re 110 years old, that’s okay, and seeing as that may be the last time you wake up, don’t spend it worrying about if that’s true.
Signing out at the last 5:47 of 9/15/2007 ever,
Everly Pleasant
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